5 Steps to You – by Katy Hill

Katy is an award winning TV & Radio Presenter and Personal Development Coach and Speaker with her company LIMITLESS, encouraging others to live their biggest, boldest, LIMITLESS life.

1. ALL THE FEELS

When I was going through a huge breakup, my mates would arrive at the door of my one bedroom flat I’d rented in Kew, having left the home I shared with my ex.
I’d say “I’m weirding out”… and they’d ask if a) I wanted company or b) they should leave me to it. I KNOW! It goes against ALL the girlfriend codes since time began BUT… your mates need to know not to put a plaster on it – however tempting that might be. Allowing yourself to feel and to process is SO important because.…

2. MOURN IT AND MOVE ON

f you don’t mourn it, you can’t move on AND, crucially, it’ll come to bite you on the arse when you least expect it. Even if it was you who instigated the breakup and you know ultimately it’s for the best, it’s still a tough process to go through. Life as you knew it has been shaken to the core. The forever you’d planned now isn’t happening. So don’t try and bury everything.

3. YOU YOU YOU!

Focus on the massive positive of being able to be ALL YOU. And I don’t just mean having exclusive access to the evening Netflix remote, however incredible that is!

I mean 100%, unapologetically, authentically YOU.

But who IS that?

I’m a sucker for a Julia Roberts film – zero judgement or shame here my friend! Remember the one when her character based her egg choice on that of her partner at the time? There’s this scene after it’s pointed out where she’s excitedly cooking ALL the eggs ALL the ways to find out how she likes them. How do you like YOUR eggs meaning – Who are YOU? The you without the plus 1. This is your moment to discover and re-discover who you are!

4. BACK TO YOU

The re-discover is KEY! Because what have you parked? We tell ourselves all kinds of new narratives in life. I always loved high adrenaline activities – years of jumping out of planes and flying fast jets on Blue Peter will do that to a girl! But I’d told myself I didn’t do that anymore because I was now a mum. A few years back, whilst hosting Heart Breakfast I raced a Formula First (a small F1) car around Silverstone. And came ALIVE! Because I was STILL that girl! I’d just told myself a different story. SO – What did you used to love doing before becoming part of a couple? Surfing? Mountain biking? Motocross? The thing you used to LOVE but compromised on in your couple life? And how about you start building those things back into your new, exciting world of YOU?

5. YOU ARE A BADASS!

BADASS is the word for me that sums up your 100% biggest, boldest LIMITLESS self! So find the most powerful word that works for you. Lioness? Godess? Then write “I AM A BADASS” as the title, then write 1. 2. 3 and list your 3 most powerful life moments: the presentation you knocked out of the park despite being terrified, the raise you managed to secure with the tough boss, the human you made, the accident you survived… your biggest, boldest life moments.

Put it on your bathroom mirror and say the phrase and re-read your list EVERY.DAMN. DAY.

YOU get to decide who you are from here on in. You’re turning over the page to a new chapter that YOU get to write, full of SO many people who are rooting for you and SO much potential!

I’ll leave you with my favourite quote from my Limitless workshops: